


Look Before You Linger

by purinsu



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Kuroneki, M/M, Pre-Aogiri, Romance, Valentine's Day, slight au where kaneki meets kanae and hori
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-13
Updated: 2015-02-13
Packaged: 2018-03-12 05:42:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3345677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/purinsu/pseuds/purinsu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Honestly, Kaneki should really watch out for that purple-haired ghoul.  Even though the color suited Tsukiyama well and his face took Kaneki’s breath away, he shouldn’t simply let the Gourmet eat him alive.  Even though Tsukiyama could charm his way right into Kaneki’s heart, he should know that the extravagant man was bad news for him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Look Before You Linger

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Kaneki! I made you a card!” 

Kaneki stood in the hallway, staring at the mass of red, white, and pink construction paper in his hands. Scrawled in the middle of the jumble was what appeared to be two people.

Hinami pointed at the card.

“This is you,” she said, pointing at one squiggly form. Kaneki squinted. “And this is me.” Hinami pointed at the other squiggly form. Kaneki squinted even harder. 

“Thank you so much, Hinami! You remembered my eye patch,” he said, patting Hinami’s head. She beamed. Since the girl was pretty endearing, Kaneki forgave her her lack of fine motor skill. A kid her age ought to have better hand-eye coordination, though. 

“Since you don’t have a girlfriend, can you take me to the bookstore later today? I really want to start reading another one of Takatsuki’s stories.” Hinami danced around a bit. “It’ll kind of be like a date!” She twirled. 

_Bookstore._

_Takatsuki._

_Date._

The three magic words set Kaneki off on a shudder of PTSD flashbacks. 

Kaneki always used to fill the quiet moments in his life gobbling up every single word Takatsuki placed on paper. Recently, however…. 

The last time someone charmed Kaneki into going on a date using Takatsuki’s books, he ended the night drenched in somebody (some _thing_?) else’s blood. Not exactly his idea of a good time.

Kaneki scratched the back of his head. “Sorry, Hinami, but—”

“Please?” Her eyes widened, and the tiniest of frowns drew her eyebrows together.

The second to the last time someone charmed Kaneki into going on a date using Takatsuki’s books, he not only ended the night drenched in his own blood, but woke up in a hospital a few days later as the recipient of his date’s internal organs. Even less of his idea of a good time.

“My shift at Anteiku—”

“Puh-leeeease?” 

Kaneki rubbbed his temple. He wasn’t sure what was more horrifying: his last two “dates,” or the fact that a thirteen-year-old girl was trying her hardest to take him out on Valentine’s Day.

“Well, I’ll see if Koma and Irimi are willing to cover for me later in the afternoon.” 

“Yay!” She clapped her hands excitedly. “I’m gonna go get ready!” She ran up the staircase, skipping up by twos.

“Hey—I still have to work the first shift!” Kaneki had to raise his voice as she bounded further away. “We won’t be leaving for at least a few hours, you know—” 

“That’s fine, I’ll draw you another picture!” The hem of her skirt disappeared around the corner at the top of the landing.

Kaneki sighed. It was highly unlikely that Hinami would use his taste in literature to lure him into being her dinner. 

He walked down the stairs to Anteiku, hoping that there wouldn’t be too many happy couples to serve in the café.

\--

_“Could you please forget about this, for me?”_

_Kaneki blinked up at Tsukiyama, his eyes following the droplets of blood that fell from lavender hair and dripped down the Gourmet’s handsome face, and for a second, Kaneki thought that maybe he could…._

“Ahem.”

Koma ambled into the kitchen, setting a tray of dirty dishes into the sink. Apparently, Kaneki had been drying the same teacup for the last five minutes, lingering in thought over a man he really shouldn’t have had anything more to do with. 

“Koma! Um, sorry, I — “

Koma nodded knowingly. “Looking forward to spending some alone time with Hinami?”

“N-no! I was just— just, uhhh.”

“No worries, kid. Girls always fall for older men,” Koma said, ruffling Kaneki’s hair with his freed hand. “It’ll go great.” Koma gave him a thumbs up.

“Girls always fall for _gentlemen_ ,” said Irimi, who opened a drawer to retrieve a set of utensils. 

“The Devil Ape used to be a real lady’s man back in the day!” Irimi let out a snort, walking back out to the front room before she could be subjected to any more of Koma’s love advice.

Ears turning a light pink, Kaneki made it a point not to let another bout of inattentiveness be noticed by his coworkers. Thankfully, it was a school day. With only Koma and Irimi on hand, Touka and Nishio weren’t there to poke fun at him, too.

“Anyway, it’s all about confidence. You gotta learn to make some moves yourself,” Koma said, lecturing. “Even a nice guy like you can do it, if you try.”

“Koma. Do you think I have a chance?” 

“With who, exactly?”

“No one in particular. I was thinking out loud,” said Kaneki. He poured the brew for his waiting customers. Hopefully they wouldn’t be too irritated that he had kept them waiting while he’d been off in his own head. With the cups balanced on the tray, and his memories of Tsukiyama tucked carefully in the back of his mind, he went to the front room.

\--

The hands of the antique clock in Anteiku reached half-past two. Couples filled the small café, caught in their own little romances.

“If any one of our valued customers would like to partake in anything more, we will be taking the last orders now,” Kaneki said, his voice resonating through the small café. “We will be closing for our early afternoon break in half an hour.” He began to clear a table. 

Right as he finished his announcement, the front door chimed. Someone bright, and rather clashing, took a step into Anteiku.

“In that case, I’ll take a coffee, _per favore_.” The customer strolled on over to the only free table, brushing his purple hair out of his eyes with a toss of his head. 

“Ah, Tsukiyama! Hello…?” 

A rose bouquet erupted from Tsukiyama’s arms and a bag swung from the crook of an elbow.

“Kaneki! _Joyeux Saint-Valentin!_ ” Tsukiyama thrust the roses into Kaneki’s arms. Then he reached out to pull Kaneki close, greeting the younger man with a deep whiff at the nape of the neck.

All conversation in Anteiku came to a sudden standstill. Feeling the blatant stares from every set of eyes in the café, Kaneki dodged under Tsukiyama’s arm and stepped to the side. Somehow he ended the maneuver with a serving tray held up as his shield. 

He had learned that move—minus the makeshift shield—from a self-defense book he had borrowed from Kamii’s main library. He wasn’t sure how he had managed it while grasping an entire garden’s worth of roses and a serving tray, but he wasn’t complaining.

“Haha, Tsukiyama! You’re always joking around like that,” said Kaneki in an attempt at lightheartedness. He dropped the roses on the counter, sending some spoons catapulting into the air like shrapnel. “Sorry! Um, I’ll be getting that coffee you wanted!” His heart pounding, he escaped to the kitchen. 

Though Kaneki had studied how to make coffee and how to engage customers with small talk while working at the cafe, his mind was completely blank with what to say to this specific customer. 

Surely, Tsukiyama’s arrival at Anteiku couldn’t be a coincidence? Kaneki contemplated the ghoul’s intentions while prepping his coffee. What could the Gourmet want with him? Did Tsukiyama still want to eat him? Did Tsukiyama intend to devour him _on Valentine’s Day?_

A chill went up Kaneki’s spine.

“Kaneki? Are you all right?” Koma’s voice cut through the depths of Kaneki’s inner thoughts for the second time that day. “If it’s about Tsukiyama, the Devil Ape can give that pretty boy a pounding—”

“I-I-It’s nothing like that! I wasn’t thinking about Tsukiyama at all!”

“Then was it about Valentine’s Day, again?” Koma cocked an eyebrow at the young man under his charge. Kaneki really should be more careful of Koma, too. They hadn’t been acquaintances for long, but the man somehow knew enough about Kaneki to discern the exact content of his thoughts. 

“Nothing like that either, I’m afraid,” Kaneki said. Between Tsukiyama and Koma, he wasn’t sure who the bigger threat right now. He stumbled out of Koma’s scrutiny with Tsukiyama’s coffee in hand, since, after all, running away from problems had always been one of his strong suits.

The main problem lounged in a chair, legs crossed, right where Kaneki had left him. “You wound me, Kaneki! You weren’t thinking about me even as you were making my coffee?” Tsukiyama pouted. Kaneki cursed ghouls’ superior hearing in his head. “How will you ever serve Anteiku’s customers properly if you don’t think about their needs?” Kaneki shrugged.

“Sorry? I guess I need to work on that more.” Tsukiyama grasped Kaneki’s hand after it moved to put the cup on the table. “Y-Yes, Tsukiyama?”

“Do you know what _I_ was thinking about while you made my coffee?”

“….coffee, perhaps?” Kaneki really didn’t like where this was going. 

“ _Non, non_ , Kaneki, but it did have something to do with something… _délicieux_.” Tsukiyama pulled Kaneki’s hand towards him, forcing Kaneki nearer.

“W-what, then?”

“You, _mon cher_.” Kaneki was now almost completely down to Tsukiyama’s eye level.

Irimi was working a table nearby, worried about the attention the pair received. “Tsukiyama, this is all really unnecessary,” she said under her breath. 

“We’re perfectly fine, thank you very much. _You_ , however, are butting in.” Tsukiyama regarded Irimi with the same interest a ghoul might have in eating a piece of cake. 

“Hey, having some trouble there?” Koma had been watching the three of them over the counter between the kitchen and café.

“And you, in the kitchen.” The line of Koma’s mouth pulled itself taut. Tsukiyama frowned deeply as he eyed Koma’s gelled hair. “Yes, you. _You_ are cramping my style, and tremendously so.” On Tsukiyama’s ghoul interest scale, Koma might have rated on the same level as a particularly moldy piece of cake. “Is that a _pompadour?_ Ugh.” 

“ _Loser! Loser!_ ” Hinami had wandered downstairs, drawn to the sound of commotion. A bird sat perched on her shoulder, squawking his usual greeting. She had another card in her hand.

“I couldn’t agree with you more.” Tsukiyama wondered if most birds had this much sense. 

“Kaneki, is something wrong?” 

“Nothing much—just talking with a customer.” Kaneki moved to get between her and Tsukiyama. 

“Just a customer, Kaneki? Don’t be so aloof,” said Tsukiyama.

Hinami stepped around Kaneki, wanting to get a better look at whoever he had been talking to. Upon seeing Tsukiyama, she practically swooned.

“Woah…” Her eyes shone. “A fairy-tale prince!” Kaneki searched his mind for stories with ridiculously beautiful princes who dressed in dubiously coordinated outfits. He came up empty handed. Though by the entranced expressions of some of Anteiku’s customers, Tsukiyama might as well have been royalty.

Tsukiyama stood and walked over to his new admirer. “ _Bonjour._ ” He plucked a rose out of the bouquet and bowed low. Tsukiyama offered the girl the rose. 

Hinami giggled. “ _Merci_.” 

“What would your name be, _mademoiselle_? I’m Tsukiyama.” 

“My name is Hinami! And this is Loser.”

“ _Loser! Loser!_ ” Not to be outdone, the bird introduced himself in good manner. “ _Loser!_ ”

“I’m very pleased to make both of your acquaintances, _Mademoiselle Hinami. Monsieur Loser._ ” Koma made a gagging noise. Tsukiyama shot him a glare over Hinami’s head. “Let’s all sit down and have a chat, shall we?”

Tsukiyama steered Hinami and Kaneki into the seats at his table. Koma and Irimi also began to go about their business, watching Tsukiyama’s table out of the corners of their eyes.

“Hmmm, what’s this?” Tsukiyama pointed at the paper Hinami held.

“It’s my second Valentine’s for Kaneki.” 

“The second one?”

“Yup!” Hinami nodded proudly. 

“You must really treasure him.” Tsukiyama fingered a lock of his violet hair. “As do I.” 

“Do you?” She cocked her head, curious. 

Kaneki felt a bit light-headed, embarrassment rushing to his cheeks. Hinami smiled away, unfazed. 

“May I have a look?” 

“Sure,” Hinami said, handing it over to him. Tsukiyama examined Hinami’s handiwork. 

“I see…this is Kaneki. And this is Hinami,” Tsukiyama said.

“That’s right!”

“ _Très bien! The_ details in the hair and the clothes! Oh, and the ruffles on your dress are perfectly darling.” Kaneki gaped at Tsukiyama while Hinami fell under the man’s spell. 

“Is it okay if I ask Tsukiyama some questions, too?” Tsukiyama nodded, ready for his interview. 

“Did you bring those roses for Kaneki?”

“ _Oui_.”

Hinami pointed at the gift bag hanging off of the back of Tsukiyama’s chair.

“Is that for Kaneki, too?” Tsukiyama nodded at the girl. 

“ _Oui_.”

“Even though boys don’t usually give other boys these kinds of presents?” 

“Great question, Hinami! Well, I am rather fond of Kaneki, and it’s Valentine’s Day, after all. I was thinking that it was about time that he and I let ourselves be…,” Tsukiyama played with his tie, searching for the right words. "… _consumed_ by our passions.” 

Kaneki almost stopped breathing.

Tsukiyama faced Kaneki, who had been sitting next to him and was doing his best to ignore Tsukiyama’s advances. Tsukiyama reached under the table, placing his hand on Kaneki’s thigh. Biting back a yelp, Kaneki fidgeted under Tsukiyama’s touch. 

“Won’t you please be my Valentine, Kaneki?” Tsukiyama peered at him with his lavender eyes. “Won’t you spend the rest of the day with me?” Kaneki lowered his head, hiding his one visible eye under the black of his hair to avoid Tsukiyama.

“Um, I already promised to take Hinami to the bookshop.” Kaneki turned to the girl for reinforcement. “Right, Hinami?”

“But that was before your knight in shining armor showed up!” Kaneki reminded himself that he should go through Hinami’s bookshelf and root out anything that might give her any more ideas about fairy-tale romances. 

“I did want to start Takatsuki’s new novel, though...” For the first time that day, disappointment tinged Hinami’s voice. Kaneki latched onto it with all his might.

“See? She was looking forward to it so much! I can’t let Hinami—”

“Takatsuki, you say?” Tsukiyama reached back to loop a finger around the handle of the gift bag. “I was going to give this to Kaneki, but I think you deserve it a lot more right now.” Hinami took the bag from him and plopped it into her lap. She reached her hand in and, after a few moments of rustling around in the tissue paper, she pulled out, to Kaneki’s horror, a copy of his favorite author’s newest book.

“Thank you so much! Looks like Kaneki’s free for the rest of the day now.” Kaneki looked between Hinami and the book, betrayal written on his face. Did he just get traded for a book?

“Now that that’s settled…” Tsukiyama stood, taking Kaneki by the arm. Kaneki pleaded wordlessly with Koma and Irimi, but intervention on their part in a room full of humans was virtually impossible. Tsukiyama slid his fingers into his wallet, producing a bill. “Mademoiselle Hinami, be a dear and take care of my coffee for me? You can keep the change.”

“No problem!” 

Did money just get added to the exchange? Kaneki processed very little of what was happening to him as Tsukiyama dragged him out the door.

“Have fun,” Hinami called from the doorway. “Be nice to Tsukiyama! Anybody who likes Takatsuki and flowers can’t be a bad person!”

Kaneki sincerely hoped so.

\--

Kaneki sifted through a pile of finery, struggling to figure out what limb went in through which opening. Observing and occasionally muttering, Tsukiyama’s servant Kanae sat on a stool, twirling a rose. His eyes sparkled every time Kaneki tripped over a pant leg or missed a button hole. Tsukiyama had left Kaneki in his care, but he didn’t seem to be doing much caring. 

With no assistance whatsoever, Kaneki coaxed most of the pieces onto the correct parts of his body. 

“Um, Kanae?”

“What.” 

“Where are the trousers?” Kanae cocked his head over to the chair where Kaneki had left his uniform in a heap. “Oh, you want me to use my own?”

Kanae rolled his eyes. “ _Nein_. Have a look under your garments.” Kaneki fished around and pulled out a set of bottoms. “There you have it.”

“These? This can’t be right.” A pair of shorts dangled from between Kaneki’s pinched fingers. 

“Master made them, so it can’t be anything but right.” 

“I’ll—I’ll just wear my uniform.” Kaneki held his plain black trousers in his hand, only to have them yanked away in an instant. Kanae pulled a handle in the wall and a chute opened up. Humming a jolly tune, he promptly dumped Kaneki’s clothes in and let the cover slam shut.

“This leads down to the incinerator. The Ghoul Restaurant usually uses it for, how do you put it—Scraps? Leftovers? Not that your case is much different.” Kaneki blinked, dumbfounded. “Put those on unless you want the Doves to catch you for being a Valentine’s Day exhibitionist.” 

Kaneki pulled the shorts on, praying that they’d get longer as they slid up his legs. He checked himself in the mirror. Unfortunately, he could only confirm that his prayers had gone unanswered. 

Bemoaning his fate, Kaneki considered his remaining wardrobe. He only had a few leather straps left to puzzle over. 

“If you don’t mind me asking, what are these for?” 

“Those are _sock garters_. You use them with _socks_.” Kanae’s voice lilted in derisive tones.

“But the socks already have elastic in them? They can stay up by themselves—”

“ _Hartneckig!_ It’s about looks, not functionality.” 

“Oh. I see.” Before Kanae could bark any more foreign words at him, Kaneki bent down, tightening the garters around his calves. Then he clipped his socks up. 

“After much trial and error, you’ve successfully dressed yourself. Congratulations.” Kanae clapped his hands limply, grimacing as though he regretted not throwing Kaneki into the incinerator with his clothing. “Come sit over here so I can see what I can do about that face of yours.” 

Kaneki obediently moved over to the vanity, an arsenal of cosmetics waiting to assault him. He thought about all the poor souls who had sat in this very same seat, prettying themselves up, dressing themselves up to become someone else’s dinner at the Ghoul Restaurant. What was _he_ doing here in this seat? What—

“Ow!”

While removing Kaneki’s eye patch, Kanae’s fingers had slipped, letting the elastic straps whip the thing back into place.

“Ooops! Sorry.” The second time, Kanae pulled the patch off roughly, but at least it left Kaneki’s face. Without waiting, Kanae slathered some flesh-colored liquid onto Kaneki’s skin with a sponge. 

“Ugh—”

“Don’t ‘ugh’ me,” said Kanae, starting to wield tools from both hands. Kaneki sat perfectly still. 

“Kanae, I have some last questions…” Some pointy object jabbed at his waterline, making his eyes tear up.

“Hmmph.”

“You said Tsukiyama made these shorts.”

“Mmmm-hmm.”

“Did he make all of these?” Kaneki fiddled with his vest, fingers running over the seams and stitches. 

“Mmm-hmm.”

“Uh, how exactly did he—arghgh-arghargh?” Kanae applied something waxy and glossy to his lips mid-sentence.

“Hmm?” 

“Arg-arghgh-argharghrgahghuh?”

“Speak up, would you?” 

Kaneki swatted Kanae’s hand away from his mouth. “How exactly did he know my measurements?”

“Master is a _juggernaut_.” Admiration for Tsukiyama brought Kanae to lecturing Kaneki with words and full sentences again. “Figuring out the measurements of a waif like you wouldn’t even begin to challenge his mind.”

“I wish the juggernaut would have added a little length to his calculations.” Kaneki tugged at the cuff of the shorts, hopeless.

“Talking about _moi_?”

Tsukiyama had arrived, dramatic as ever. He walked up to the vanity to look over Kanae’s shoulder. With one glance at Kaneki’s face, he shrieked.

“What’s wrong?” Kaneki asked.

Smirking, Kanae spun Kaneki around to the mirror. Kaneki wasn’t sure if his sight was mildly damaged from Kanae’s jostling, but the person staring back at him conjured up images of a drag queen. Except drag queens probably had better cosmetology skills and a lot more restraint in blush application.

“Kanae, you usually do such wonderful things with makeup, but, today…”

Tsukiyama settled down on a stool next to Kaneki. He gave Kanae a stern look.

“For now, please call the little mouse and tell her we’ll be on location slightly late.”

With a curt bow and a low chortle aimed at Kaneki, Kanae whisked out of the room. 

“Little mouse?”

“You’ll meet Hori soon enough. But first, this.” Tsukiyama reached out and tilted Kaneki’s face up for closer inspection. Kaneki’s shoulders tensed. 

This was the very first time where he found himself completely alone with Tsukiyama. Did Kaneki unwittingly place himself on Tsukiyama’s menu once again? Was the ‘location’ another arena full of ghouls, itching to rip into his flesh? 

Kaneki stopped worrying the second Tsukiyama leaned in and opened his mouth wide. Panicked, adrenaline coursed through Kaneki’s body, beating his heart to a palpitating frenzy. The half-ghoul sensed his kakugan on the verge of activating, and he clenched his eyes shut. He braced himself for the inevitable….

But all he felt was a light puff of air on his face and a hand ruffling his hair. Then something soft and moist dabbed at his lips. He cracked one eye open to see Tsukiyama in a metallic cloud. Tsukiyama held a tissue soaked in makeup remover in his hand.

“I have no idea what that Kanae was doing, but he somehow got—what is this, eyeshadow?—all over you and your hair.” Tsukiyama scrunched his nose. “And the shade of this lipstick....”

Pulling a few more plies of tissues from a box on the table, Tsukiyama continued wiping at Kaneki’s face. He ran the tissues across Kaneki’s cheeks, ridding them of their false rouge. Both eyes open now, Kaneki looked up. He met Tsukiyama’s gaze.

“I think an _au naturel_ look suits Kaneki the best, don’t you think?”

Heat doused Kaneki’s cheeks, swiftly replacing the color Tsukiyama had just removed.

\--

“Tsukiyama, I don’t think I can do this,” Kaneki said. Bright lights shone on him. A billion people passing by slowed down. They gawked and judged while he cowered. Why did Tsukiyama have to choose a shopping plaza of all places?

“I’m not sure if I can do this right or not,” he said, hanging his head.

“We’re just taking some pictures, not taking an exam.”

A petite woman waited nearby. “Yeah, Kaneki, don’t worry about it. Tsukiyama’s a pro,” she said, adjusting the focus on a lens. “Just follow his lead.” 

Upon finding out that Tsukiyama had a human friend, Kaneki was truly surprised. Upon finding out that Tsukiyama had a human friend whose hobby was taking extravagant pictures of Tsukiyama, he was slightly less surprised.

“Are you two ready to start this, or what?” Hori held up her camera. Tsukiyama had asked her to do the photoshoot, after all. 

“I don’t want Master to waste his time on this, either,” Kanae said from behind Hori. He had his hands propped up on his hips.

“I guess I’ll give it a try….” Defeated, Kaneki let himself be swept away by Tsukiyama’s enthusiasm. 

“That’s the spirit!” said Tsukiyama, flashing him a smile. Not sure how to respond, Kaneki brought his hand to touch at his face, as he always did when he was nervous.

“First, let’s warm up and do some casual standing poses,” Hori suggested. “With the both of you.” 

At first, Kaneki stood there stiffly. The erratic flashing distracted him, and his uncovered eye wandered. It avoided Hori and her camera, avoided Kanae sulking, avoided the inquisitive onlookers, and most importantly, Kaneki’s eye avoided Tsukiyama. Ever since Tsukiyama had helped him get rid of Kanae’s awful makeup, Kaneki just couldn’t bring himself to look directly into Tsukiyama’s eyes.

“Kaneki?”

“Uh, yes?”

“Relax.” Following Tsukiyama’s advice, Kaneki took a few deep breaths. In, and out. In, and then out again. But it did nothing. The muscles in his shoulders and back were still so tense, they ached. 

“I’m not so great at relaxing, well, with so many people watching…”

As if Kaneki didn’t feel pressured enough already, he could hear the chattering of the audience that had gathered.

_“—are they cosplaying?”_

_“Uwaaa!!”_

Completely ignoring the snippets of conversation, Tsukiyama patted Kaneki’s hair. “I’ll help you out.” Still uncomfortable, Kaneki didn’t feel all that much better with that suggestion. “If the problem is the amount of people, focus all your attention on me.”

“What?”

Tsukiyama reached around the small of Kaneki’s back to draw him in close. “It’s just you. And me. We’re the only two people in the world right now. Everything else is a distraction,” he said in a whisper. Tsukiyama’s breath tickled Kaneki’s ear, making him squirm. Sensing his discomfort, Tsukiyama pulled back slightly. “Talk with me. It’ll keep your mind occupied.”

“…talk?”

“Unless there’s something else I can do for you that’ll help you relax?”

“No! I-I mean, talking is fine.” Still avoiding Tsukiyama’s eyes, Kaneki searched for something to start the conversation with. But all he could think of was the man right in front of him. So he decided to go with it.

Kaneki appraised Tsukiyama’s suit. “You look a lot more…muted than usual.” It was such a dark purple that it appeared black unless Kaneki got up close and personal with it. Which was exactly what Kaneki was doing. He took a step back to put some distance between them.

“Is that bad?”

“No, it’s just not very…you.” Kaneki bit at his lip, thinking. “For better or for worse, the Tsukiyama I know always grabs the spotlight.” 

“Such words, Kaneki! Sometimes, I do like to tone it down. I know when to step back to let other stars shine,” he said, followed by a wink. 

Kaneki’s stomach lurched. It was when Tsukiyama said things like this that Kaneki started to lose his grip on reality. Though Kaneki remained somewhat wary, they continued their talk through pleasant murmurs and tiny smiles, voices so soft that only the two of them could hear themselves speak.

Hori sensed the mood on set change in her favor. She tried to move slowly, smoothly, to keep Kaneki from remembering that she was there. She really shouldn’t have worried. By then, Kaneki was completely oblivious.

\--

_“Bunch of weirdoes.”_

_“It’s a public place, too—”_

The words made it to Kaneki’s ears, but he could barely make sense of any of them; the darkness and fire of Tsukiyama’s kakugan and the light touch of the Gourmet’s tongue and fangs on his hand currently held his full attention. Only Kaneki could see this, since Tsukiyama had his face angled away from the camera and any other onlookers.

Kaneki jerked his hand away. He backed up, tripping over his own feet. 

Tsukiyama’s eyes cleared up and his fangs retreated. “Kaneki! Where are you going?!”

“I just need to—to get some fresh air! Sorry—!” 

Tsukiyama watched as Kaneki swiftly vanished into the crowd. Instantly, he felt bitten by the cold, abandoned.

Everything was going so well. Kaneki had been so, so absolutely _dolce_ in front of the camera, innocence so apparent in the young man’s hesitant touches as they posed. The gourmet didn’t need to see the test shots to know that every frame was deliciously perfect. 

And then he had gone and spooked the little lamb.

Seeing the excitement come to an end, the audience around the photoshoot slowly thinned, babbling about the scuffle. Tsukiyama hated the guilt that crept into his heart, hearing their accusations. 

“You scared him off?” Hori cocked her head at her longtime friend. “Or maybe he’s grossed out by you?” 

“Do you really think so?” Tsukiyama asked. 

Tsukiyama held himself back the entire day, the finest example of a gentleman if there ever was one. True. He had indulged himself in a few whiffs of Kaneki’s aroma here and there, but how could he not? Okay. He had also grazed his hands over Kaneki every once in a while, but he hadn’t tried anything _too_ daring…but maybe the licking and the teeth and the eyes were a little too much. 

“The you scaring him off part? Definitely. The grossed out part? Maybe.”

Kanae came out of nowhere to shake his rose in her face, the petals raining down on the three of them. “ _Du scheißt mich an!_ Watch your mouth, guinea pig!”

Nonchalant, she brushed the petals off the screen of her camera.

“Anyways, we shot for over an hour. We could probably just end it right here,” said Hori, clicking through some pictures. “Despite my first impressions, I have to admit that your newest fixation actually comes out really great in photos.”

“Not as great as Master does,” Kanae said, hoping to raise Tsukiyama’s spirits with a compliment. It didn’t work. 

“Kanae. Help Hori pack her equipment up and get her home.” Tsukiyama shrugged on his winter coat, did up the buttons, and tucked his scarf in. He threw Kaneki’s coat over his shoulder.

Kanae and his rose sagged. “What about you, Master?” 

“I’ll be fine on my own. I’ll be even better once _mon cher_ is with me again, though. _Ciao._ ” Tsukiyama slunk off into the stream of passersby and was gone. 

Now that their only common interest left them, Kanae and Hori got to work. There were a lot of things to put away, after all. 

“There he went. I kind of want to follow and take a few more pictures.” Hori folded up a tripod. “But it’s probably not gonna be as exciting as his hunting scene. That was ages ago.”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

Hori rolled up the cords and wires, tying them in place to keep them from knotting up in transit. “It has everything to do with anything.” 

“What are you getting at?” 

“There’s no way Tsukiyama actually intends on eating that kid. He probably doesn’t even know it himself.”

“ _Das ist Quatsch!_ How would _you_ know?” 

“Haven’t you noticed? That one-eyed ghoul is all he talks about, day in, day out. I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s all he thinks about, either.” Kanae’s eyes narrowed, but he let Hori carry on uninterrupted. “Kaneki is the driving force in almost everything that he does nowadays. Tsukiyama wouldn’t be able to handle the desolation after his most captivating meal is gone.” 

Hori paused, thoughtful. 

“And most of all, he never plays with his food for this long.”

\--

By now, it was dark, and many of the shops had closed. Tsukiyama had criss-crossed past seemingly countless storefronts in pursuit of Kaneki, encountering his sweet fragrance everywhere, but finding him nowhere. He had been led through bookstores, toy stores, high-end clothing stores, a supermarket, and to his utmost horror, a hundred yen shop. At a loss, he found the nearest bench and slumped down. His usually perfectly made hair had come undone, and he didn’t even care. Clutching the empty coat and closing his eyes, he burrowed his face into it, trying to replace Kaneki’s absence with his scent. _“Mon cher,”_ he whispered softly, keening. 

\--

At first, he thought he only imagined the sound. When it became louder, he was sure. He heard the only footsteps in the world that could make his pulse race.

Kaneki shuffled his feet, scraping the bottom of his shoes against the grit of the sidewalk. He came to a halt. “Tsukiyama.” 

Tsukiyama glanced up, suddenly self-conscious. He had been caught whimpering with his tail between his legs. Shivering violently, Kaneki sat down next to him. Why had he insisted on having the poor dear wear shorts in the middle of winter? Oh, right. His fashion sense. That was it.

In a flash, Tsukiyama had the coat he brought onto Kaneki’s shoulders, zipper pulled up as high as it would go. Never one to forget a final touch, Tsukiyama took off his own scarf and wrapped it around Kaneki’s neck, pulling the ends tight in an elegant knot. 

“Sorry I ran away from the photoshoot.” Kaneki took some comfort in the still-warm scarf. He played with the folds in it, nervous. “But I—I want to, I mean we...could we take a few more pictures?”

“Are you sure? Hori should already have left by now, though I can try calling her.” Tsukiyama reached into his pocket to pull his phone out to do just that, but a touch from Kaneki stayed his hand. 

“Um, actually, is it okay if we just use a photo booth?”

“Photo booth?” 

Shuffling his feet, Kaneki answered. “I’ve always wanted to go, but I’ve never had anybody to go with me before.”

Tsukiyama examined the man sitting next to him. “In that case… _va bene._ ”

Kaneki smiled warmly. “That didn’t sound like a ‘no,’ so let’s hurry before it closes.”

\--

Being a weekday night, the prospect of school and work the next day rendered the arcade almost deserted.

Kaneki’s hand brushed Tsukiyama’s as they walked past the photo booth curtain, reminding them both of the chemistry they had at the first photoshoot. 

Kaneki thought that the interlude in the wintry air between then and now was enough to calm his nerves. 

He was wrong. 

Reluctant, Kaneki unwound the scarf, hoping that doing so wouldn’t reveal the burn he felt on the inside. He threw it on a shelf on top of his coat.

“Since you’ve never been in one before, why don’t you try it out? I’ll leave my fate to you.” Luckily, Kaneki had graciously returned to him. He unbuttoned his coat and hung it up on a hook, hoping he would cool down. With that, Tsukiyama moved to the back corner of the booth, sat on the bench, and waited. Even if being in a small, confined space with Kaneki drove him mad, he’d keep himself under control. Tsukiyama didn’t want to scare him off for a second time that night. For once in his extravagant life, Tsukiyama was going to be grateful for what he had and he was going to keep his hands to himself.

When Kaneki let the coins fall into the slot, the photobooth greeted them with cheer.

 _“Welcome! Choose your favorite background in 10, 9, 8, 7…_ ” Kaneki couldn’t care less about what background they used, but he hunched over the touchscreen at the front while it energetically encouraged him to make his decision. He didn’t want Tsukiyama to see the way his hands were shaking—with cold? Perhaps apprehension, or anticipation? 

Trying to hide whatever he was feeling, he faked a deep interest in his task. 

“Tsukiyama! Which one should we use?”

“Whichever you like the best, of course.

“But—”

_“…3, 2, 1! No selection made? A background will be chosen at random! Please pose for the first picture in 10, 9, 8…”_

Pressured by the countdown, Kaneki leapt for the bench, almost landing in Tsukiyama’s lap. Moving as if his life depended on it, Kaneki scurried off to the opposite side of the bench, startled. 

_“…3,2,1!”_

The camera flashed once, and the image of a poised, if somewhat weary, Tsukiyama and a panicked Kaneki showed up on screen against a background of tiny purple and black polka dots. 

“Is it so hard for you to pretend that you like me? Even if it’s only for a picture—for a fleeting moment—won’t you do it on this one day? For me?” Kaneki saw Tsukiyama pouting and batting his lashes at him, playful as usual. 

Underneath the surface, however, Kaneki thought that there was a certain tenseness around Tsukiyama’s mouth that shouldn’t be there. A frown that was a little too deep. Eyebrows drawn too closely together. Kaneki shoved his hands in pockets, too busy keeping his own nervousness at bay to think of anything tactful to say to put the other man at ease. This helplessness didn’t flatter him at all.

Seeing no reaction, Tsukiyama’s performance faltered. “People usually do these kinds of things with people they don’t hate. Sorry.” 

Confused as he was by his own emotions, there was one thing that Kaneki was sure of. The only thing he hated at that moment about Tsukiyama—the Tsukiyama who should’ve been making grandiose speeches, gesturing outrageously, and being wildly unapologetic for acting on his own whims—was that the man wasn’t being at all like himself.

Kaneki squeezed a tiny bit of courage from somewhere. Speaking softly, he started to answer. “Tsukiyama, I don’t—”

 _“Please pose for the next picture…”_ The machine had drowned him out.

Kaneki scooted a fraction towards Tsukiyama. 

“You decided to indulge me a little?” Tsukiyama joked ruefully, yet he kept his eyes cast downward, away from his greatest desire. Kaneki was doing him a favor, had been doing him a huge favor the entire day, letting himself be lugged around at Tsukiyama’s every beck and call. The little lamb was too nice to turn someone down directly, and he shamelessly took advantage of that. 

In spite of that logic, it was all Tsukiyama could do to keep himself from reaching out to touch him. He squeezed his eyes shut, drowning out all sensation of his favorite obsession. 

_Calmato, calmato…._

_“…3,2,1!”_

The camera flashed once more. Had Tsukiyama bothered to look at the picture that showed up on the screen, he would have seen Kaneki gazing at him hesitantly, his own face strained. Tsukiyama’s fingernails dug into his knees to keep his body from moving.

“Tsukiyama?” Getting no response, Kaneki came even closer. He could almost feel the half-moons of Tsukiyama’s nails cutting into his own knees as he watched, alarmed. Had he done something to upset him? Kaneki guessed that having your date flee from you on Valentine’s Day might’ve been pretty awful, but he came back, didn’t he? “Tsukiyama? Are you okay?” Still no response.

With Tsukiyama frozen in place, Kaneki summoned a lot more courage than he had before. If anything was going to happen, he’d have to be the one to make the first move.

“Shuu?”

Something warm sidled up to Tsukiyama’s side. “You should stop that. You’re hurting yourself.” Tsukiyama could feel delicate fingers settle on his hands. Complying with the touch, his grip on his knees loosened. A comforting weight settled in his lap, followed by someone gripping his lapels and snuggling against his chest. That someone rested his head on Tsukiyama’s shoulder. 

“Shuu.” 

It was then that Tsukiyama’s eyes snapped open to witness the impossible.

“Kaneki, what—” Tsukiyama’s sentence faltered as soon as he felt the other rub his face against his neck. There was a long intake of breath on Kaneki’s part. 

Caught in the thick of the air around them was the tang of expensive fabric, the richness of buttery leather, the sharp metallic of silver accents, and the tantalizing warmth pulsing under the skin’s surface. Below that hovered the fragrance of violets, drifting to the forefront at times, then receding into the background at others. 

Kaneki never freaked out about, well, _smells_ to the extent that Tsukiyama did, but he thought that maybe he was beginning to understand what the Gourmet went through every day. 

“You smell, um…nice,” said Kaneki. He instantly regretted how lame he sounded, but it seemed to have worked, unexpectedly.

“Thank you. But you’re the one whose aroma is more _magnifique_.” Even under duress, Tsukiyama let flattery slip from his mouth. Encouraged by some sort of normalcy in Tsukiyama’s behavior, Kaneki continued. 

“Ooof!” Accidentally bumping the top of his head against Tsukiyama’s chin, Kaneki looked up through his dark fringe shyly, offering a sheepish grin. Abruptly—his breath caught in his throat.

Kaneki was used to seeing Tsukiyama’s hair swept neatly to the sides, perfectly coiffed. Now the violet locks hung down, windswept. It was a lot less controlled than usual, but just as beautiful. It covered his face in a lilac curtain, his eyes trained on Kaneki from under his thick lashes. Flushed, Kaneki ghosted his trembling fingertips across Tsukiyama’s collarbone and up the man’s jawline to his mouth. 

Taken by the moment, Kaneki closed his eyes. Tsukiyama’s lids also lowered, heavy with anticipation. He felt Kaneki’s weight shift on his thighs with hands landing on his shoulders; the boy was leaning in. Something dewy and velvety-soft lapped at his lips, contrary to the Gourmet’s expectations, but not entirely unpleasant. Tsukiyama lifted his lids slightly, curious. 

Kaneki ran his tongue against his own lips, contemplating the lingering, flowery sweetness. “You taste nice, too,” he said, unable to produce anything more eloquent. 

“You’re too kind, Kaneki. But we both know that you’re the one whose essence is most _dolce_.” 

Kaneki was glad that the regular Tsukiyama had returned, though something tenuous still remained in the man’s limbs. And that’s when he noticed that besides the places where he himself had initiated contact, Tsukiyama wasn’t actually touching his body anywhere. Looking at them now, he saw that Tsukiyama was holding his arms seemingly pinned to his sides.

“It would hurt me if I hurt you…like last time,” said Tsukiyama, explaining. 

“We’re the same, remember? Ghouls don’t break so easily.”

Tsukiyama stared into the other’s face in disbelief. He really shouldn’t get his hopes up like this. For the first time that night, he tripped over his words, vulnerable. 

“You really shouldn’t spoil me so, but, but, m—may I?” 

“Help yourself.” 

Decadent as ever, Tsukiyama slid his hands across Kaneki’s bare thighs, relishing the feel of his palms against the creamy expanse of skin. He reveled in how Kaneki’s limbs quivered under his touch as his finger ran up his spine. Tsukiyama brushed his hand through Kaneki’s dark hair, his pleasure swelling with each soft sigh that reached his ears.

Now. 

They both leaned in, a breath away from claiming the other for his own. Then—

_“ –3, 2, 1! Time’s up! Please exit the photobooth and print out your pictures to the right!”_

Kaneki blinked rapidly then jolted, almost clawing his way out of Tsukiyama’s arms. Tsukiyama grasped at the air, bewildered. 

“I’ll be stepping out first!” Kaneki tossed on his coat and scarf, and flew out the doorway.

Feeling abandoned once more, Tsukiyama sat there for a few minutes, dazed. How had his worst nightmare happened for the second time in the same day? Weighed down with sluggish disappointment, he struggled to put his coat back and tidy his hair, his mind reeling. It was going to be a cold journey back home.

Walking back through the photobooth curtain, Tsukiyama almost knocked Kaneki over onto the ground. Tsukiyama steadied the falling man by grabbing onto Kaneki’s arm and pulling him upright. 

“Thanks!” Kaneki flashed him a smile. It faltered a second later. “Oh, and this is for you. It’s not much, but I hope you like it.” He pushed a small parcel towards Tsukiyama, who took it gingerly. “They didn’t turn out as well as I’d like, though.…”

“Can I open it now?”

“If you like.”

The bright orange wrapping was slightly crinkled, but the seal was stuck neatly in place. Tsukiyama gently peeled the adhesive off and tipped it. 

A picture frame made from pressed violets slid out into his hand. He remembered seeing something like this catch his eye in one of the many gift shops he had passed through in search of Kaneki earlier that evening. In the frame, however, Tsukiyama saw the events that transpired only moments ago, laid out like a film reel: 

His gloom. Kaneki’s uncertainty. 

His caution keeping him back. Kaneki reaching out to him. 

His privilege. Kaneki’s trembling. 

Their unfulfilled _crescendo_.

Tsukiyama lowered the frame, his eyes falling on the Kaneki here, real, and right in front of him. 

“Shuu?” 

Tsukiyama leaned down and seized Kaneki’s borrowed scarf. Tsukiyama tilted Kaneki’s face up, catching those wide, dark eyes with his own before they closed shut. He felt a hand glide through his hair. Pressing his lips gently against Kaneki’s, Tsukiyama lingered his touch for only a fleeting moment, then drew back. They could see the breath leave from between their parted lips, floating up in a cloud of condensation. Then it was gone. 

“How rude of me. I almost didn’t thank you for your lovely gift. Or for indulging me all day.” Tsukiyama tucked the scarf back neatly around Kaneki’s neck. 

“You’re welcome,” Kaneki said. Courage welling in from somewhere, he continued. “Well, then. If you’re fine with it….Would you mind letting me indulge you another time?”

Tsukiyama didn’t think he’d mind that at all.

**Author's Note:**

> happy valentine's day!!
> 
> i needed more cute-ish shuuneki in my life and this is what happened


End file.
